In 5 years...

In FIVE years...
Ella will be 8, Ben will be 5 1/2, and I will be 35. Both of the kids will be in elementary school full-time and I will be...

I dont know! After graduating college I never began a career. My degree was in sociology and all the jobs that I could have applied for right out of college were super intense and super under-paid. I made more money bartending than I would have had "making a difference" out there in the work field. So now, as the time ticks closer and closer to Ella entering school, I am left wondering what I will do when my identity is no longer a "stay-at-home" mom.

I suppose one option is to continue being a stay-at-home mom. I know that my kids will be in school all day, but I could find things to fill my day. Cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, yoga classes, volunteering with school, girl scouts, dance classes, music lessons, karate classes, boy scouts, pedicures...basically, I could busy my time pretty efficiently without the kids slowing me down all day. I mean, kids are exhausting. Completely, totally, utterly exhausting. Maybe after 8 years of full-time baby wrangling I will welcome a break- A moment of time not totally dedicated to talking, teaching and disciplining children. Perhaps, I will DESERVE a break. After all, stay-at-home moms dont get nights or weekends off, no vacation time, no paid overtime, no (monetary) bonuses, and definitely no sick days. Maybe elementary school is my reward for nearly a decade of child rearing. My "job well done" pat on the back. My small moment to think about my goals for the day without the constant noise and controlled (ok, sometimes not so controlled) chaos for just a few hours a day. Of course, as usual, I feel like a wholsome dinner must be ready every night, laundry should be clean, house should be neat and tidy. (I cant say they are all done all the time-but I try, and I do feel guilty if they arent accomplished)

I think option two would be starting a second career. (or a first career, since bartending for the past decade cannot really count as a "career") I dont have any desire to do anything with sociology...so where does that leave me? Going back to school? Getting my masters? A second bachelors in a field that interests me more with better job potential? That will take a couple years. I need to start exploring those options now. A masters will take at least 2 years, plus getting into a program, plus finding a job afterwards...thats a lot of time. Do I chose a degree that I am simply interested in with very little practical job potential, just an opportunity to learn for the sake of learning?? Or choose a plan that has a definate job path?

What am I interested in? What jobs sound intriguing? Cultural anthropology? Counseling? Genetics? Idk. There are so many fields of study out there. I have always wanted to go back to school, begin to use my brain again. I have always dreamed of becoming a professor (of something) walking through campus on a crisp fall day wearing a beautiful funky scarf and a t-length camel colored wool coat, carrying a satchel filled with papers and syllabi. I could still make that happen: My second career as a professor in a funky college town. Or perhaps a geneticist? That would be cool. I loved my genetics classes in college, loved my bio classes...maybe that would be a cool field of study that had an actual job path. So much to look into...

Option three would be going back to part-time bartending. No additional schooling, no take home work, no job pressure, just a fun job with little stress, making drinks for people I have known for years. But realistically, how long can I do that job? There is no 401k, no insurance, no raises. Can I bartend at 60? Will I have wished that I had added more substantially to our retirement fund? Would I want to have something more to show from my working years other than an awesome martini? Will I want something more fulfilling? Will I feel silly telling people that i am a 35 year old bartender? I dont know. There is a lot to consider, but I know for absolute certain that I am thrilled by all the possibilities! Getting older is awesome.

What is not awesome? This new blogger layout where I cant figure out how to freaking spell check. I can rule out master speller as a career option, this I know for sure.